Saying goodbye

How to say goodbye: (1) Look at the person, thing, animal, job, etc. that must go, and say the words you need to say: say why, say how you feel, say "goodbye." (2) Let them/it go, leave, walk out the door, fade in the rear view, move on, etc. (3) Be ready for the emotions: profound sorrow, deep emptiness where that object/person/being filled a space, sometimes relief, ambivalence, inner-conflict, anger at the person or the circumstances that prompted this pain and difficulty. (4) Accept the emotions (meaning: don't fight them or talk yourself out of them) and pass through them while you hold onto *hope.* Talk with a trusted friend or counselor, every time it's necessary, for as long as it's necessary. They'll pass. This is grief. (5) Begin to fill the space and time with new activities and experiences you *genuinely* enjoy. (You can't skip this or fake this. Just filling the time being busy won't work. You need to be intentional about enjoyment.) (6) Allow joy again.

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